The Demorat is a satirical publication. Every article on this site is parody, written for entertainment and commentary. None of it is real news, and none of the quotes are real.
Our reporters are fictional. Our sources are imaginary. Our editorial standards are, at best, aspirational. Any resemblance to actual persons, events, or legislation is either coincidental or the inevitable result of reality getting there first.
So what's real?
Only the bar at the very top of the page labeled REAL NEWS. Those headlines come from actual news outlets and link to their original reporting. Everything below that line is made up.
Why?
Because sometimes the fastest way to the truth is a straight-faced lie, delivered in AP style.