LeBron James played his first game as a Philadelphia 76er on Tuesday night at Madison Square Garden, and while every other player on the court stood still for "The Star-Spangled Banner," the King apparently decided it was the perfect time to work on his short game.
Video from the opener against the Knicks shows James swinging his arms in what looked a whole lot like a golf swing, then mimicking a jump shot or two, all while the anthem played. Barstool Sports posted it with the caption, "Never a bad time for The King to practice his golf swing." The internet did the rest.
On Thursday, President Trump weighed in on Truth Social: "While listening to our National Anthem, LeBron James disrespects our Country! I said right from the beginning that he's no good, a TOTAL DISGRACE." He added that James "should apologize to all of those Great American Warriors and Heroes who died for the American Flag." Then at his rally in Sioux City, Iowa, Trump brought it up again: "During the national anthem he's practicing his golf swing. I said what the hell is that."
Honestly? Fair question. What the hell is that? You're 41 years old, in your record 24th season, you've made something like half a billion dollars playing a game invented to keep bored teenagers out of trouble, and you can't give the country 90 seconds? Even toddlers can stand still for the anthem if you give them a juice box. Even the Philly fans who threw snowballs at Santa Claus stand still for the anthem.
LeBron's response came after Thursday's home opener: "It must be a slow news day at the office." Coming from a man whose entire career has been one long press conference about his feelings, that's rich. LeBron has never had a slow news day in his life. He tweets about his hairline and CNN runs a panel.
In LeBron's defense, the Philadelphia Inquirer pointed out that the motion in the video lines up with a left-handed golf swing, and James is right-handed, so it may have just been a stretch. Great. So the official defense is: "He wasn't golfing during the anthem, he was doing yoga during the anthem." Thank you, counselor. No further questions.
Sixers coach Nick Nurse called the whole thing "outside noise," which is what every coach says when the President of the United States is roasting his star player. And look, the Sixers did beat the Cavaliers 114-106 Thursday, coming back from 29 points down, with LeBron dropping 17 points and 10 rebounds. Good for him.
But here's the funny part. Before Thursday's game, while Boyz II Men sang the anthem in Philadelphia, LeBron stood with his arms behind his back and his head bowed. Perfectly still. Like a kid who got caught passing notes and suddenly remembered his manners. It's amazing what a little presidential attention will do for a man's posture.
We reached out to LeBron's golf swing for comment. It said, through a representative, "I'm just here to stretch, bro."
The Demorat would like to remind all professional athletes that the anthem lasts about a minute and a half. Your hamstrings will survive. The putting green will still be there.
This is satire from The Demorat. Real facts are drawn from news reports. Invented quotes, including the golf swing's statement, are parody and not real.
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