Michigan Rep. Haley Stevens told reporters Sunday she is "still a very proud Democrat." About an hour later, the Michigan Democratic Party told her she isn't one.
That's the fastest a Democrat has been fired from anything. The party has had a Hunter Biden laptop, a border crisis and an 81-year-old president with a teleprompter problem, and nobody moved this quick. Stevens endorsed one Republican and got the door before lunch was digested.
Here's what happened. Stevens lost the August Senate primary to Abdul El-Sayed by less than one point. On Sunday, two days before the election, she sat through services at Perfecting Church in Detroit with Republican nominee Mike Rogers. Then she recorded a video in her car and said it out loud: "I am endorsing Mike Rogers for the United States Senate."
Her reason was simple. She said El-Sayed's campaign told her she wasn't welcome and should stay away. So she stayed away. All the way to the other guy's pew.
Then the line of the weekend. "I'm still a very proud Democrat," she said. "I still very much believe in everything I voted for and said."
Lady. You just endorsed the Republican. That's like a guy announcing he's a proud Lions fan while wearing a Packers jersey at Lambeau.
State party chair Curtis Hertel did not take the scenic route. "Congresswoman Stevens is not a current member of the Michigan Democratic Party, nor will she be in the future," he posted on X. Not suspended. Not censured. Deleted. The party that keeps telling you everyone belongs found the one person who doesn't, and it was their second-place finisher.
Her own office emptied faster than a Michigan Costco on a snow day. Justin German, her chief of staff for eight years, said "many members of our team have resigned, including myself." Eight years of loyalty, gone in one Sunday service. Even the staff picked El-Sayed. That's not a team. That's a hostage situation that finally ended.
DNC Chair Ken Martin called it an "effort to sow division within our party." Sir, your party just kicked out a sitting congresswoman two days before an election. The division has been sown. It's harvest season.
Nancy Pelosi called the endorsement "horrific," according to Fox News. Pelosi, who once tore up a State of the Union speech on live television, is now the voice of decorum.
And House Minority Leader Hakeem Jeffries told CBS News he hasn't been closely following the tensions between El-Sayed and Stevens. The biggest story in his party, in one of the closest Senate races in America. Not following it. Somewhere a man is watching his house burn down saying he's more of a big-picture guy.
The only person thrilled was Donald Trump. "I'd love her to join the Republican Party," he said, per Fox News. He says he's never met her. That's one more meeting than Jeffries has had with this story.
So let's review the scoreboard. The Democratic Party spent years telling you to put country over party. Stevens says she did. The party responded by putting her outside the party, which is the one place in Michigan they're sure she won't vote.
She's still a very proud Democrat. The Democrats just aren't very proud of her. And by Tuesday, she may be the only Michigan Democrat with a job guaranteed through January.
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The Demorat is a satire publication. This article is parody and commentary based on real news reports; jokes, exaggerations and fictional elements are not factual claims. Quotes attributed to real people are drawn from published reporting.
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